Questions to Ask When Choosing a Mediator

Mediation is lightly regulated almost everywhere, which means the title 'mediator' tells you less than it should. The good news: a short conversation with the right questions reveals a great deal. Any mediator worth hiring will welcome them.

Training and experience

• What formal mediation training have you completed, and with whom?
• How many matters like ours have you mediated?
• What professional background do you bring besides mediation (law, business, diplomacy, mental health)?
• Are you affiliated with any mediation organizations, panels, or rosters?

Style and approach

Mediators differ meaningfully in style. Facilitative mediators focus on structuring the parties' own negotiation; evaluative mediators (more common in commercial settings) may offer assessments of positions; transformative mediators prioritize the relationship and mutual understanding. None is universally right, but the fit with your matter is worth probing.

• How would you describe your mediation style?
• Do you ever give your view of the merits? Under what circumstances?
• How do you handle sessions when emotions run high?
• Do you use private caucuses, and how do you treat what's said in them?

Process and logistics

• How do you structure a matter like ours, sessions, length, sequence?
• Do you mediate solo or with a co-mediator, and why?
• How do you handle confidentiality, and what are its limits?
• Can attorneys or advisors participate?
• What are your fees, how are they shared, and what happens if we settle early?

The co-mediation question

Some practices offer co-mediation, two mediators working together. It can bring complementary perspectives (for instance, one mediator with legal-commercial background and one with diplomatic or interpersonal expertise), additional capacity in multi-party matters, and balance across different communication styles. Ask whether it fits your matter and how it affects cost.

Trust the conversation

Finally, weigh the meta-evidence: did the mediator listen more than they talked? Did they explain the process clearly without overpromising? Did they acknowledge what mediation cannot do? The way a mediator handles your questions is a preview of how they will handle your dispute.